3 Year Old Not Potty Trained – Signs, Tips, and Tricks To Potty Train Your 3 Year Old The Right Way

The fact is potty training doesn’t have to be stressful. Period! It’s the parents who are way more stressed than the kids and thus making your kids uncomfortable with trying a new, different thing. Research suggests that most kids are potty trained between the age of 2 and 3 years, but every child is different, and so is their development for the necessary gross motor skills. Learning how to use the toilet depends on the child’s ability to understand the process of peeing and pooping.

They’ll develop the cognitive, physical, and emotional skills that help them recognize that it’s time to go pee-pee or poo-poo or to be able to hold those muscles until they reach the toilet and then let go. These skills are usually developed after they are 18 months old and fully developed by 36 months.

To make the potty training go smoothly, choose the proper outfit and potty for your kid, get a step stool, schedule a fixed time, buy picture books, and lastly, be patient with your kid.

Are you worried about your 3-year-old who is not fully potty trained yet? Are you kind of embarrassed that your kid has to wear a diaper when he goes out? When I had to potty train, my little guy, I remember the stress the whole process comes with and the worry whether my kiddo will adjust to it.

So, relax and breathe in and out, take it one day at a time, and who knows, your kid might even surprise you one day by going to the loo alone without your help.

When should I start potty training my kid?

When should you potty train your kiddo?

The worst thing you can do is jump the gun and begin potty training too early (which will be disastrous).

Don’t rush in this process when your kid is too young because they will not cooperate, and you will just end up frustrated.

Most children are different when it comes to potty training. You can gradually start potty training your kid after they turn 2 when they become more curious about the toilet and wants to know what goes on in there.

But, it is also very intimidating for them to adjust to an entirely new environment and may not show interest until they are 2 ½ or even 3 years old.

They have been in their diapers up till now, and suddenly ditching those diapers and becoming a big boy overnight can be daunting.

 So, start potty training them when they begin to show signs that they are ready.

5 signs that your child is ready to potty train

It’s essential that your child is ready to potty train, and when this happens, there are few cues that your kid will give. I knew that the day had finally arrived to start potty training my kid when he started showing the following signs.

1. You have to change fewer wet diapers now

Till the age of almost 2 years, your kid will pee frequently, but a kid who is ready for potty training can go longer- a stretch of almost two hours, with a dry diaper.

2. Your child will tell you when his diaper is dirty

Your kid will soon try to indicate that she has already wet or soiled his diaper and wants you to change him.

3. Your child will use the bathroom lingo

Before your child goes #1 or #2, they will announce it to you (I’m going to poo poo!). They will start communicating to you through words or even through a grunt. Whatever the sign is, you need to understand them and help them towards potty training.

4. Your child shows interest in what others do in the toilet

Going in the toilet alone will not be possible once your kid shows curiosity about what goes in the toilet and why everyone goes there. They will want to know what Mommy or Daddy do in the toilet.

5. Your child will know how to undress himself

You will soon start to notice that your child has become a little independent by learning how to pull off and pull up his pants. This skill will help him once you start potty training and when he needs to go to the toilet immediately.

The other common tell-tales are:

  • Their bowel movements have become regular.
  • They wake up in the morning with a dry diaper.
  • They want privacy when they start pooping in their diaper.
  • They express interest in wearing underpants.
  • They can follow instructions well.

How long does it take to potty train?

That really depends on your child and how patient you are with your child.

Teaching your child how to use the toilet at the right age and showing signs of readiness makes the whole process go smoothly.

Once your kid shows that he is ready, potty training can last from two to three months, and if you’re super lucky and your toddler is ready, it can also take just a couple of weeks.

Tips on how to potty train your toddler

A toilet with a toddler seat and stand are setup to help the little one learn now to potty train.

Choose the right outfit

If you’re starting potty training your kid, then gone are the days of overalls and onesies. Dress them in something that can be pulled up and down, like pants or dresses that can be easily hiked up

Buy the right potty

Let your kid choose whether he wants his own potty or potty seat. You want your child to feel completely safe and comfortable in the potty seat. A shaky potty seat that is placed on the toilet can be frightening for the child.

Get a step stool in your toilet

If you’re going to make your kid sit on a training seat, then it’s better to get a step stool to rest his legs on.

Dangling legs can cause fear of falling and can be uncomfortable for him, which can instill a fear of going to the bathroom.

Create a daily schedule for potty training

Pick a time for potty training every day so that your child is habituated to a potty routine. Don’t start when it is most stressful, like the birth of another child, or if you have just moved to a new place. Let him sit on the potty every day for at least 5 minutes to make the surroundings familiar.

Tell him about potty training through picture books

Give him picture books during the daytime or read him books about going to the toilet to give him a heads up on what will happen.

Wear your patient hat

You cannot rush in this process. You and your child are both new to this and need to trust each other and be patient, especially you, the parent!

It can be frustrating at times but don’t scold, scream or punish your kid. Instead, try to understand what’s troubling your child.

Tricks to potty train your kid

Potty training tricks that can work on your toddler

Bribery comes in handy

Promising them to give them something if they go on the toilet can be a success. For example, you can offer a few M&Ms when they pee in the toilet and a little more if they pooped.

Make sure only to give rewards when they go in the potty and not throughout the day, as the novelty would vanish for them.

You can also make a chart and buy their favorite stickers and stick them on the chart as a part of a reward they get after finishing their ‘business’ on the potty.

Go commando

This is a tactic used by many parents I know.

Letting them roam around without any underpants or diapers can make them grasp the process of potty training more quickly. It also saves the hassle of removing his pants or diaper when he wants to go to the potty.

Praise them

Acknowledge and praise them, be their cheerleader when they are successful.

But, make sure not to overdo it because it will put unwanted pressure on them when there’s an accident. Even if they don’t do it on the potty seat, appreciate them for at least trying.

Things to remember while potty training

Things to remember when potty training your toddler

Accidents are bound to happen

While potty training your kid, you cannot expect everything to go smoothly with your kid mastering this skill within a few days.

No! Accidents will happen, but don’t shame your kid or scold them. You need to be neutral and tell them that “It’s okay baby, we’ll just clean this up.” You’re likely to become less frustrated if you’re ready for the worst-case scenarios.

Let going to the potty be your kid’s choice

Let him know that he’s now a big boy or girl, and they can use the potty whenever they want. Please don’t force them into something they are not ready for yet.

If the kid is too reluctant to go to the toilet, try to understand his problems and fears, which makes him hesitant, and try to work out a solution. Know if your kid is constipated and how you can help him.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it

If you need help, ask your husband or a grandparent to pitch in if it turns out too stressful for you.

Don’t fall for peer pressure

Relatives or friends who are parents to kids of the same as yours can pass comments on why your kid is not potty trained yet. Getting worked up on such peer pressure puts unnecessary pressure on the child too.

Your kids are the first ones to pick up on your frustration. So, relax, breathe and chill. Give you and your baby a little time to cope up with the process.

If the potty training is not going well and you have exhausted all ways to potty train your kid, then my advice is to take a step back and remember that it’s okay to not accomplish something the way you wanted it.

Take a break and go back to diapers and try again a few weeks later. This will give your child to relax and get the pressure off of them. They will learn to use the toilet; eventually, all kids do.

Meanwhile, enjoy the toddler phase; shower them with your love, affection, and kisses, and start potty training again with more patience this time.

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Located in India and a mother to a joyfully mischievous son, Kelin is the wife of the world’s most patient man and a busy homemaker. When she’s not busy cooking and running after her kid,  you can find her in a corner reading, or penning down words on her laptop. She believes the world will always try to instil ‘mom guilt’ in new mothers, but she goes by the maxim ‘a mother knows best'.

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